starkingenuity | Why Can't We Be Friends?

"See, I really appreciate this actually." The scotch it good, the company is interesting and he's got a gun training on the back of his head. It makes him smile because Tony Stark isn't always in his right mind. Danger is a turn on. It means he's not bored and likely not alone. Both of these things are the utter bane of his existence.

He smiles at the shorter but equally impressively dressed man. Irish. Snarky. He gets that it's pretty rare to get a meeting like this.

"The invitation, I mean." By invitation, he really means kidnapping. Oh well. "But you know I can't do what you want. Stark Industries is out of the weapon's biz."

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From:

starkingenuity

"Risotto and lemon chicken if they have it. White sauce not red. There might be enough red sauce later and it's easier to clean up if I spill." See? He's really a very good guest. Always thinking. "Though I won't say no to whatever wine you decide on."

Alcohol of any sort is delicious and, if you ask Tony, necessary. The man's a full blood Italian after all, born and raised in Long Island.

Moran looks like he wants to hit Tony in the nose, and Tony just smiles before going for his own phone. Moran grunts and grabs it.

"Hey, I need to check my email!"

From:

dontbeobvious

Jim uses his own phone to easily hack into Tonys emails. He can get into anything and everything, not that he'd explain how. He liked to be all smoke and mirrors, appear all knowing, really he often just cheated and did it the easy way. "Hmm, one from Pepper about a board meeting you'll never attend, one about a shipment you need to sign for that you never will and a few from friends. I assume you have friends? They want you for drinks."

Either that or they were very informal business partners.

Turning off his phone, he slipped it away and peered out the window. Nearly there. And yes, they were seriously going to check into a hotel with a hostage right there beside them.

Wouldn't be the first time, his mind was going back to that magical holiday in France. Just him, Moran and Bob. Oh Bob, it was a shame to throw him off the Eiffel tower.

From:

starkingenuity

Well, they didn't have to. He gave them what they wanted but Moran made a sad face over not getting to kill anyone-- Moriarty was the best boss sometimes. Othertimes, the worst, but you have to give and take.

Tony seems impressed at least by the hack job, at least to a degree. "Could you tell Ms. Potts that board meetings are for board members, not chairmen and I happen to be the chairman?"

No sign of distress still. Tony's not really worried. Sure, he's without his suit, but JARVIS will be getting curious soon and starting pinging his location through the reactor.

In the meantime, Tony is going to enjoy himself.

This is one nice hotel.

From:

dontbeobvious

As they pulled up outside the hotel room, Jim opened the door and hopped out. He wasn't dumb enough to email Pepper. And he wasn't in the mood to point out that if it was a critical matter, it was best the chairman attends. His father never missed a meeting but then he was a by the book businessman.

Boring!

Once they were all out, Jim turned to Tony and put his hands on the mans shoulder, smiling a very demented and unsettling smile. "If you try to run or tell people you're our hostage, we won't kill you. And trust me, that's worse."

Death was merciful, living hell was much more fun.

"I'll get the hotel key. Moran, you know your job."

From:

starkingenuity

"Why would I run? I want lunch." Tony arches an eyebrow at Jim and grins back at him. He's not even remotely demented, just amused. Just very amused. He's had worse really. Being kidnapped in Afghanistan certainly has nothing on this. "And we're having fun aren't we?"

Moran isn't as pleased by being dismissed. He knows exactly what Jim expects him to do.

Go and get lunch and threaten a bunch of people.

Well at least threatening is fun.

From:

dontbeobvious

Afghanistan? Oh they had nothing on Jim. He was playing nice, he always started off nice. It got progressively worse as they went on. He left Moran to handle all the odd little duties while he approached the desk, handing over his card and a fake ID. It took a while for everything to get set up then, finally, he was offered the room key.

"Have a nice stay, Mr Brook."

Jim smiled back happily and took off towards the room, he assumed Tony would just follow.

He seemed dumb enough to believe it wasn't that bad and Moran would easily take him down if he ran.

From:

starkingenuity

Just where is Tony going to go? Or run to? No, he's curious. He also has a face that just about everyone in the entire world remembers, or knows, or wants to know which is why they are both very suddenly surrounded by mothers and children with their phones out for pictures and scraps of paper for autographs.

Tony is a ham. But he also is pretty sure that taking pictures with this 'Richard Brook' in the background is a bad idea.

But he'll sign the books. It's easier just to go along with it he's found.

From:

dontbeobvious

Jim didn't seem to mind the pictures or the autographs, he wasn't that bothered. If he didn't want to be seen and if he didn't want Tony to be seen, they'd of made sure of it. This was much of a show for himself as it was for Tony. Not for Tony and not for his client but for a certain someone back home.

Who would read the paper, see his face and know he was back.

And he was responsible for what happened to Tony Stark. Smiling into the cameras, he lead Tony along to the elevator where, finally, they were free from fans and going towards the room.

He hummed along with the elevator music, tweaking his suit jacket. "After you, of course. We're at the end of the hall."

From:

starkingenuity

Tony's mind is elsewhere. Those people the took photos... Are they going to be killed? Will their devices be stolen? Will they been scared and intimidated? He really doesn't know and it scares him more than Jim ever will. They promise of it being worse than death if he tries to run might not be a bluff.

After all, Jim can just hurt those innocents. Or have his stray dog do it.

"Yiu didn't have to get the bridal suite. But Jesus, Richard, I feel like a princess!"

He needs to get need something electrical. He needs to warn JARVIS and the best way is through the device in his chest going haywire.

From:

dontbeobvious

"Well you shouldn't," Jim said in a serious tone, turning around and very slowly, the dorkiest grin ever spread on his face. "I'm the princess here. Baby, you should of seen my crown... but the government got in my way, took it back. Looks much better on me that the queen."

He heaved a longing sigh and opened the door, shoving Tony in ahead of him and locking the door behind them. Their bags had been sent ahead of time and sat on the double bed. Well, he was hardly getting separate beds, Moran either slept on the floor or with him. Didn't care which.

"Take a seat, I'll offer you a drink. Choose wisely."

He was going to be nice, the rest of this day would be rough and there was still a 3.5% chance Tony may actually do as he asks.

From:

starkingenuity

"I think you're going to make a pretty poor follow up with that scotch in the car." He's still trying to pull off good natured and docile here. He already knows that Jim is well aware of everything he is. And probably all about SHIELD and the Avengers too.

That doesn't seem to be a problem for him. Which always spells bad news.

The crazies are the worst. They really are.

"How about a cocktail? What are you drinking?"

From:

dontbeobvious

"I'm not. One cocktail it is," Moriarty never drank when he was on the job, it was all about a clear mind. He had a thing for being at his best and that never happened when he was drinking... he just ended up screwing someone. And with Moran being all snippy today and Tony so not being his type, he didn't even want to go there.

Moriarty didn't have a professional sort of bar in his room but the mini fridge was very well stocked and they had a pretty broad table.

He whipped up something quick, it wasn't perfect and lacked the typical wedge of fruit but he wasn't a bar tender, Moran usually handled this. He slid the drink along and pulled out his phone, sending his second in command a text to get his ass up here now.

Sliding it back into his pocket, he sat just across from Tony and dropped back. "I have to say, I'm a fan of your fathers work. Not yours, you're like a sequel to a really good film, it's not bad but never compares and usually lacks that spark. No, he was a genius, the way he was with numbers? Blew my mind."

From:

starkingenuity

"Well thanks, if I ever see him again, I'll let him know he's still got one fan down here. Well two. Rogers still likes the old coot." Tony doesn't mind being ridiculed. It sort of feels forced, though he doubts Jim is saying it just to get a rise.

He sort of is positive that Jim doesn't do anything to get a rise. Tony on the other hand--

"So what's with this Richard Brooks stuff, Jim?"

What? He's a genius too you know!

From:

dontbeobvious

"I'm not surprised, no one in America appreciates a great mind, they just like the shiny bright stuff you present to them," he mocked, unable to help himself. He always mocked Americans, solely because it annoyed Moran but he forgot the man wasn't in the room... damn, he'd have to repeat that one later.

He did appreciate Tony was a genius and he wasn't surprised that he could work things out but he wasn't overly amazed.

"Richard Brook is a real man, you know? Tell me, how can you be sure I'm not Richard and I am Jim? Why Jim?"

He was curious. Especially since no one had mentioned his name, he wasn't displaying the name Jim anywhere and most importantly, no one in the world could put a name to his face. No secret government, no brilliant minds, no spies. Only Sherlock. He was sure there was a way, it clearly wasn't clear what it was.

From:

starkingenuity

"Jim Moriarty." Not really high up on SHIELD's lists of baddies to watch when Doctor Doom and Loki were flitting around. But they used him anyway, kept him in contacts, used him to contract people disappearing-- Tony got a lot more than Phase II from that bug he planted. "I'm just assuming here, there was no description of you in the files, but it fits."

Fury is going to have to explaining to do. Though Tony is pretty sure that this isn't actually one of Fury's jobs. The Council. Those about him. Which makes all of this very interesting.

"Please don't tell me SHIELD hired you for this, though. I'm pretty damned tired of having my allies kidnap me. Any chance on a second cocktail?"

From:

dontbeobvious

"SHIELD?" He burst into laughter, unable to help himself, like SHIELD had any say in what he did. They were pathetic and rather irksome, he didn't appreciate anything they did. "I'm not their ally, nor their friend, they had this very stupid idea that I would just do what they wanted because they were the higher ups. They soon shut up when I got a hold of their nukes."

Threatening to nuke Chicago was his finest moment since the fall. Moran even took photos and he made a scrap book.

The Council and himself hadn't done business since.

"No more, Moran will be here soon. Until then, amuse yourself," he put on the TV and went over to the bed to raid his luggage and make sure nothing was touched. He had a lot of personal items that took a lot of work to get through security.

From:

starkingenuity

"Liquor is sort of my amusement. Liquor or electronics--" Well, Jim did say he could amuse himself so Tony sets about taking the remote control apart before he works on the television.

Moran arrives with dinner -- in little white boxes because fuck that shit if he's going to get one of those wheelie tables with the metal domes to go over the plates. Hell no. He drops the food in their plastic bags on the bed by Jim and raids his pockets for forks and butter pats, all wrapped up in little plastic tubs.

"What's freako doing? Rewiring the AC?"

From:

dontbeobvious

"I really don't care," Moriarty said lazily from the bed, he was on his laptop, already hacked into Stark tower and having a play around with the system. He set it to disco feature and just left it like that. No doubt the intelligent system in there would trace him back eventually but that was kind of the plan. He had three days tops, one day minimum.

Sitting up, he eyed the box and-- oh, class it up, Moran!

"We need a table, we'll all sit together and eat," Moriarty insisted, they were going to kick things off after food, everyone wants a nice snack and hell, lulling Tony into a false sense of security was so much fun. "Tony, food time. Please don't break the TV, I want to watch Glee later."

Wouldn't that be a treat?

From:

starkingenuity

"Ten more minutes, I've almost got us satellite from Japan." And a little tie in with his own Tower. What? Tony has to do something to help his escape. He's not going to be stuck for three months playing lets have cocktails with this whiny little Mick!

He makes one more tweak and that ten minute window goes out the window. He flicks on the National Nihon station and grins as he pads over to the table Moran is slopping together.

Tony shares a frown with Moriarty over his pet's mess.

"Thought he was house trained--"

Moran nearly back hands him and instead shoves a styrofoam back against his chest. "Shut up, Stark."

From:

dontbeobvious

Jim wasn't stupid, he could already guess what Tony had done to the TV and he was going to get rid of it very shortly in a way that Moran was just going to love. Until then, they sat around a pleasant little table, all of them eating their dinners in a nice sort of atmosphere.

Light conversation, nice and casual, it was going very well.

Well, until Jim finished his dinner, tapped the metal fork against his teeth for a second as he thought away. The next moment, he was stabbing said fork right into Starks hand, which just happened to be sitting there unassumingly. For a little guy, Jim had some force behind his moves.

He didn't even say anything to Tony, he just left the fork in there and turned back Moran, that twinkle in his eyes. The games were starting.

From:

starkingenuity

It's just so much, it happens so quick, that all Tony can do is stare. First, the wall gets his undivided attention. And then his hand. And finally Jim. Only then does his mouth hang open, the scream still soundless for a moment. Moran makes more noise, fork still in his mouth. It's just a little snort of a thing, followed by a grin as Tony stands, knocking back his chair.

Oh, it's a mess. A hundred things pool through his mind as he gags on his own tongue and shuffles back and tries not spill the wine.

Yes, he has his priorities.

Sweat beads on his brow and pours down his temples as he finally finds his voice. "Wh--" Not much of a voice after all.

From:

dontbeobvious

It was very comical to see Tony slowly process it all happening to him, did he really think Jim wanted them to eat together for fun? It was a statement, nothing was going to be as it seemed and he wasn't here to play nice. Like he said before, he was a fan of Tonys quick thinking father, he had yet to see those traits here with Tony. Just a revamped version, logical mind but too cocky. Looking at the 'tweaked' TV, he sighed and turned to Moran.

"I suppose you'll have to shoot the TV to little bits, he's clearly tampered with it to connect to his home life and while I did put up a disruptor, lets not take the chance. Go next door, kill whoevers in there and steal their TV. We'll do it after dessert."

He grabbed the pie from the box and cut it into three pieces, ignoring Tony in favourite of the food.

"Take a seat, Tony, you'll miss out. If you don't take a seat, I'll have to make you."

From:

starkingenuity

Putting his silencer on his gun, Moran makes pot shots at the television, very slowly reducing it to a pile of neat rubble that hardly makes any noise at all. While he has his pie. Because seriously? Mmm, pie!

Tony's a little too distraught to eat actually, but he does sit, face half covered by his hand as he tries not to freak out by the piece of cutlery still extending from his hand.

He gasps like a fish, but after Moran snorts at him, the billionare manages a faint: 'now you need a new fork' to Jim.

From:

dontbeobvious

"He better not puke on our floor, handcuff him to the shower rail so if he does anything, our room is clean," Jim complained but he was in no rush, they were enjoy dessert and Tony would be out for a while, he seemed to be in shock. All of that from a little fork? What was in store next would be interesting.

Maybe he wouldn't last as long as Jim predicted. Chances of getting the company back rose to 4% - not bad at all.

"When you remove that fork, could you give it a quick swill?"

From:

starkingenuity

Ever the loyal, if grumbling, servant, Moran does just exactly as he's told before returning the cleaned off fork to it's owner. "I'm having his pie," the marksman announces, but cuts off the crusts for Jim since he knows how much he likes them and sets about eating the fruit filling with relish.

Tony's whimpering in the bathroom doesn't get much sympathy, mostly because Moran's already figured his opponent out.

"He's playing us," he grumbles. "Yeah, that shit hurts but not enough to leave him pissing in those expensive socks of his." He rolls his eyes. "I hate the clever ones."